I’ve not tried a pantoum before. It’s another form where lines are repeated, changing their places – and their meaning too, if the versifier is clever enough – between stanzas. There seems to be some freedom with the structure of the final stanza: I’ve taken advantage of this.
Look around. These are the margins:
End of the day, edge of the world,
The moment between ebb and flow
When the tide pauses and is still.
End of the day, edge of the world.
Take a breath. Remember this
When the tide pauses and is still:
Wingbeats, the curlew’s twofold call.
Take a breath. Remember this:
The sharpness of marram against the light;
Wingbeats; the curlew’s twofold cry,
Notes descending in the grey evening.
The sharpness of marram against the light.
Wing beats. Heart beats. Remember
Notes descending in the grey evening,
The moment between ebb and flow.
Lovely. As far as I can see, that’s a pantoum.
Cheers. I wasn’t quite sure about the last stanza: I wasn’t sure if line 4 could be C given line 1 wasn’t A. In the end I chose the version I liked best.
Who cares about the rules? Depends on what sounds best.